I have been on a mission to improve my mental health by taking a direct approach to self care. I realized that I had to improve my reality in order to find peace with myself. In order to change my reality I had to change my mentality or mindset. That would be the most difficult part of this journey.
I always thought that I wasn’t worthy. Worthy of love, worthy of care, worthy of anything. As soon as I shifted this idea out of my head everything started to change. I started saying things to myself that totally shifted my reality. The truth that I failed to see was that I was worthy and every human is worthy of simple basic needs. It was not necessary for me to neglect myself in order to be productive or successful. I was just as important.
I went from being selfless to selfish. Let me explain. I had neglected and negated my own feelings for so long that people knew I cared more about them and what they thought of me than how I felt or thought about myself. They knew that I would go out of my way, sometimes to my own detriment, to help or please them instead of myself.
This caused me a lot of stress and I lost a lot of time and rest because of it. I missed important moments in my life because I was focused on what other people thought or felt about me.
I immediately changed this behavior by asking myself “How does this affect you?” “How will this help you?” Will this make you feel good? Will this give you peace?” As soon as I started to care more about me and my feelings people started to call me selfish. A title I was happy to take if it meant that at the end of the day I would have peace and be happy with ME.
You have to know you’re only selfish to people when they can no longer use you for their own selfish gain.
Everyone is fine with your life falling apart as long as it serves them. Protect yourself and your peace. Affirmations were number one in helping me to create a mindset that served me. I also have a gratitude journal that I try to write one thing I am grateful for everyday. You have to be your own cheerleader. You should never push or motivate anyone harder than you do yourself. Counseling also helped me to overcome a lot of stigmas that I attached to myself.
Once I made my mental space peaceful and inviting, my physical world started to follow. I was living healthier, sleeping better, stressing less, and enjoying life more. I even started to look better because it made me feel good to focus on myself which caused me to cultivate my style. My makeup, hair, clothes, even my hygiene started to reflect how much care I was putting into myself.
I don’t have any magic formula or great ancient secret for this but, I promise if you take time to focus on yourself, Your life will change dramatically. Give yourself the love and care you deserve. You are an awesome person and you deserve the best. Give it to yourself. No one will ever love or care for you more than you.
Sometimes people just need to hear a kind word. The world is full of hate and unrest. It’s hard to find kindness or even courtesy. Let’s give people more of what we want.
I have always wanted to be loved and well liked. How can the universe give me something that I’m not willing to give others? My grandma used to say “ If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” I’m taking that to heart this year.
I make it my intention every day to say something nice to anyone I meet. Even if it’s just a warm hello or good morning. I say it with a smile and a little enthusiasm. People love to be greeted.
I’ve also made it an intention to encourage people I see struggling. Everyone needs encouragement. Not everyone has a strong support system at home. Your kind words may be the only and last kind words that they ever hear.
Life is so short. We must help each other on this journey. We must band together and climb up this mountain called life. Please find it in your heart to be kind and encourage someone today. It will make you feel just as good as them. It’s a great cure for the blues.
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” ― Maya Angelou
I have been looking forward to fall all year long. Fall and winter are my favorite seasons of the year. I love the cooler weather and the cozy clothes and especially sitting by the fire late night. I love the cool, brisk air and the scents that fall brings. I love the changing colors of the trees and the new birds that visit me on their way south for the winter. I love the fall sun sets. They are so gorgeous with all the beautiful colors that only the creator could paint the sky. I’m truly in constant awe at how nature truly transforms in preparation for the season change. I am also transforming along with nature.
My transformation has been happening for two years. I have come to my senses about caring for myself. I used to be the last person on my list and now I am the first. I realize that I have to take the best care of me in order to take care of anything else. I have to monitor my health more and pay attention to myself and how my natural cycle affects me and my emotions. Self-care is preached to us on all social platforms but rarely do anyone give us the true instructions on what exactly self-care is and how do I do it successfully. Well allow me to share my Self-care tips.
Pay attention to how You feel. Your feelings are the ones that matter. Do what you have to in order to fill your cup. Rest and reset. You’ll be so much better for it.
Arrange your schedule and activities accordingly. If you’re tired and need to rest don’t fill up your schedule with a whole bunch of tasks. Take it slow. You won’t sleep when you die, you’ll just die when you die. Sleep and rest are important.
Take time for you to be alone with yourself. Quality time is important for every relationship. Your relationship with yourself is no different. Spend time getting to know yourself and enjoying your own company.
Monitor your thoughts and the cycle of those thoughts. I know that there are a lot of factors that affect our thoughts. Our hormones, the phases of the moon, even the time of year. Our job is to monitor those thoughts and redirect them to a positive and uplifting state.
Remove things from your life that do not serve you. This one is simple. It’s time for a mental and emotional declutter. Whatever it is get rid of it and let it go.
Walk away from people and places that do not bring out the best in you. There are just some Friendships and relationships that are just not worth the drama and stress that they bring. Free yourself from these things, they will only hold you down and bring you down.
Take the time to develop your mission statement and build your life around it. Give yourself the time to develop who you are and who you want to be. You will never regret giving yourself direction and standards.
Find and practice the habits that will help you to be the best version of you. It’s not the big things that make up our routines. It’s the small things. The old saying that it’s all in the details is the truth.
Don’t give up on yourself. You are worth the effort. You are worth fussing over. You are the most important person in your life.
Give yourself some grace. Nobody’s perfect. Everyone makes mistakes and you really can’t do it all. Give yourself some grace. It’s really going to be okay.
Everyday I have to choose to keep up with my goals, my habits, my health, my body. I choose me. For once I choose me. From now on I choose me. It is a choice to put yourself last. It is a choice to neglect yourself and your health. Sometimes our head is so foggy we don’t realize that we are choosing to put other things ahead of ourselves. How on earth are we surviving this way? How are we managing our lives, our families, our careers or even our households without putting ourselves first. You are the CEO of your life. Have you ever seen a company not care for its boss? Would you treat your boss the way you treat yourself?
Your life is falling apart because you are letting yourself fall apart. Give yourself the love and attention you give everyone and Everything else. Change is good and changing how you love, treat and care for yourself is always a plus. No one is going to care for you more than you care for yourself. Make sure you are giving yourself the best care.
This month was a month of new discoveries. I have been on a low buy for six months and I can assure you I have had no FOMO. (fear of missing out) I already have a sizable makeup collection and I am dedicated to using up what I have before I purchase any more. Unfortunately, being a makeup junkie as well as an influencer has overloaded my makeup storage. After a big declutter and donations I still have many products to get through.
First, let’s talk about skincare. I have really been enjoying the ELF holy hydration cleansing balm. This product is amazing at getting off all of the makeup and making my skin squeaky clean. I love to massage this product in for 60 seconds and then rinse. I find that it can really do it’s job when I massage it in for a little while
I follow that with my Olay foaming cleanser. These two are a powerhouse cleansing team for me. I never understood double cleansing until I started to do it with these two products. The Olay cleanser is a foaming ceeam cleanser. Again, catering to my dry skin.
My favorite moisturizer is still the Charlotte Tilbury Magic cream. That cream is a life saver for my dry/ combo skin. It’s marketed as a one and done product for moisture and priming. I use it for both. I can use all the help I can get when it comes to prepping my skin before makeup. I love how thick it is and how my skin feels after using it.I was also skeptical about this product at first because of the hype around it.
Even Charlotte Tilbury said that it will give you “Supermodel” skin. Really? I think it plumps the skin and gives it a nice glow and I let it sink in for a few minutes before I do anything else. It’s an awesome moisturizer but, my skin needs a little bit more. I have very dry, mature, textured skin. This cream alone is great but for the longevity of my makeup I have to use a primer.
For primer I use the Wet n Wild moisturizing serum primer. This product was a surprise to me. At a time when everyone was coming out with serum primers, this one flew under the radar. I looked for reviews and Tik Toks about this primer and there was very little hype around it. It is amazing though. I have to give it to Wet n Wild for nailing it with this one.
It makes my skin so smooth and soft. It creates the perfect base for makeup. It gives a good glow and a little pore filling. It is a great product for the price.
My foundation of the Moment is the NARS radiant long wear foundation. This foundation gives me the perfect coverage and it wears incredibly well. I love to wear it to work because I know it will last and look good even at the end of a 12 hour shift.
The finish is very skinlike. It has medium buildable coverage which I like. I still love my full coverage foundations but this one has stolen my heart at the moment. My favorite concealer is the Maybelline instant age rewind. I have loved this concealer for a while now. I was so happy when they extended the shade range. Now it’s available to more skin tones in better shade ranges.
For bronzer I am still working Through Fenty sun stalker bronzer in Mocha Mami. I have had this bronzer for a year now and am only starting to hit pan. That goes to show how little you need to get a sun kissed glow. I go back and forth between this and the Charlotte Tilbury powder bronzer which I have no sign of hitting pan on any time soon. The Charlotte Tilbury bronzer I have is in the deep shade and is slightly cooler in tone but gives the same effect on the skin.
For my other face and eye makeup I am using the Natasha Denona glam face palette in the deeper color. This was a wise investment for me because a face palette makes my life so much easier. I already have a few Charlotte Tilbury face palettes which have made my life a lot easier as far as my makeup is concerned. For me, having everything in one place makes my makeup routine so much easier. I can get a full face done with less products. I love this palette because it contains my signature look with a few extras. I love a deep brown smoky eye and I can achieve it with a little flair using this palette.
I was skeptical at first because of the cream products in this palette. But, as it turns out, the formula of these are just perfect for my skin. I love how smooth and easy they are to work with.
For lips I have been enjoying a few matte lips. First is MAC velvet matte lip in devoted to chili. Second is Dose of colors Mood liquid lip, third is Charlotte Tilbury Pillow talk medium.
All three of these are different matte formulas, which is a favorite of mine at the moment. The Powder kiss by MAC has a mousse texture and is very moisturizing without being slippery or traveling into fine lines which is what you want for a vibrant red. I want my red lip to stay in place and not travel all over my face.
The Dose of Colors liquid lipstick in Mood is a deep burgundy almost burnt brown on my lips. It is a traditional matte liquid lip color. I love it because it really is a mood. It is gorgeous for fall, and I love it for days when I’m not wearing much makeup. It’s a comfortable formula and I love the way it wears.
The icing on the cake is the Charlotte Tilbury Pillow Talk Medium. This is my everyday go to nude lipstick. Depending on how I apply my liner I can make it deeper if I like. It has a very comfortable wear. It is a traditional bullet lipstick with a semi matte finish. I have seen this color on lots of different skin tones and it reads different on every single one. It’s almost like those mood lipsticks we used to wear in the 90’s. It adjusts to each person’s skin tone. I love the way it feels on the lips. It’s a silky-smooth formula that makes your lips look supple and feels soft when you press them together.
I hope you enjoyed my August faves and maybe some of my favorites are your favorites too. Let me know some of your favorites and why in the comments. Friends always share. May peace and love follow you through your life journey.
So lately I’ve been debating about whether or not I wanted to switch out my planner. I have been using the Clever Fox planner for a few months. While I like this planner, I do miss my ring planner.
I finally decided that I would love to finish up the rest of the year in my ring bound planner. I’m proud of myself for giving the Clever Fox 🦊 planner a try for as long as I have. I really did stick with it for a while.
I really miss being able to reset my planner when I felt like I was in a rut or bored with the layout.
I’m back in my half letter, disc bound planner. I have customized this planner with Cloth & Paper and Notiq inserts. I love my half letter planner. It make’s me happy.
I have always used a planner every since junior high school. It’s a habit that I am glad I adopted earlier in life. It has helped me to accomplish my goals and keep my life in order.
If you feel like you’re having trouble getting things done try a planner or planning system. You can even use a plain notebook to make your daily schedule, routines, and to do’s. I even track my health in my planner. Mental, physical and emotional health.
You don’t have to just make plans in a planner. Tracking your health, finances, family, pets, hobbies etc. is also great to write down in your planner.
My planner contains my whole life including my journal and my bible study. I also track and write about the books I have read.
I hope that this post helps someone who needs a little help getting things done or getting organized. If you would like more information on planning or planners leave it in the comments. I would also love to know what you all are using and how you like it.
I used to love working and going places. Now I can’t even get out of my bed to go to work without some sort of anxiety attack. I’m trying my hardest to get back to normal but I just can’t seem to get in line. My life is forever changed. I wasn’t an introvert. The pandemic made me one. I used to have plenty of friends and vast social circles.
Now, I barely want to go to the grocery store or go in at a gas station. If I can be serviced at my car or have things delivered to my house, I’m satisfied.
I never thought this would change me but it has. I’m not the same person I used to be. I never did large crowds. Now I can’t even do large crowds online. The sight of a large group makes me cringe.
I would love nothing more than for things to go back to normal. It still won’t change the fact that I can’t get back to normal.
I have been using this planner for three months now and I can’t begin to tell you how it has changed me and the way I achieve goals.
I had been looking for a new planner in January. After failing to keep up with any other planner that I own, I decided to give this one a try. I had never been a bullet journal person so I really had to do some research on this brand and it’s tool.
The book itself is absolutely gorgeous. I picked the Mystic Blue color. It came beautifully packed in a gift box, along with a few sheets of stickers. Needless to say, I have already ordered more. I love having simple decorations in my planner.
This planner begins with a little shadow work prompts to help you figure out your mission and purpose. This gives your plans and goals clear intent. It also gives you prompts for gratitude and affirmation.
I love the way this planner is setup. I have the weekly version but there are so many different types to choose from. I’m sure you can find one to suit your needs. I also have one in a binder style. Both are A5 size. That’s the size that works best for me. They can fit into any of my bags.
The best planner system I have ever used. I love the book style as well as the binder style. The only con is that you can’t buy refills for the binder style. I think they are phasing that style out. I also love the paper quality and the sturdy feeling.
This planner allows you to have a real plan and helps you stick to your goals. I love the layout and all of the prompts. I hadn’t thought about it but I’m glad I have some clarity. I’ve also become more focused and intentional.
The best part of all was the affordable price. I didn’t spend an arm and a leg to get everything I needed in a planner. Your year is going to be awesome no matter what planner system you choose but please give this one a try.